Full information about the mechanical choices open to you can be read on the web site of the manufacturer at Owen Mumford.

Once you have seen the information, you may want to speak to a therapist to help you decide on what is right for you.
Or you may have made your decision, and want to contact a therapist to help you decide how to make it part of your lovemaking. All of us are able and willing to discuss these choices with you.

• KY Jelly- Available in a range of sizes, this is the best known and most often used lubricant. However it can feel cold, and become sticky. It is available on most chemist shops at about £2 53 per 82g Tube. Try it, and if you don't like it, try something else.
• Aquagel- Very like KY, but some people say it is less cold. £1.27 per 82g Tube. Available from FPA SexWare Catalogue
• Sylk- Is more liquid, and like the natural vaginal fluid. It is not n oil, but a polymer. It costs about £9.95 per 40ml, from FPA SexWare Catalogue
• Senselle- Very like Sylk, and available from Boots and other chemist shops at about £2.25 per10ml, £5.75 per 40ml. High street chemists and FPA SexWare Catalogue have it.
• Replens- Is a pessary containing hormones and is meant for menopausal women who may have dryness of the vagina because of the lessening of oestrogen that happens in the menopause. Insert one every three days or so. £3.85 per pack of 3, £6.95 per pack of 6. Available from FPA SexWare Catalogue, and most chemists.
• Vaseline- Is a tried and trusted method, if rather old fashioned. There are nicer products. Never use it with condoms or diaphragms as it may damage the latex.
• Other oils- Vegetable oils are OK in some cases, but be careful that what you use will not cause an allergy, or damage condoms or diaphragms.

The trainers are graded in size, from the size of a rather fat finger to the largest one being equal to a large penis. If a vagina can take the largest trainer, it can manage a penis! Sometimes the smallest is not small enough, so you could start with a cotton bud, or something similar.

You will need plenty of Genital Lubricants, like KY jelly or oil to help your trainer to slip into the vagina. Start with the smallest size that gives pressure on the walls of the vagina. If it does not give pressure then it is not helping. You should feel strong pressure, but not pain.

Squeezing and relaxing the muscles that control your pee will ease the pressure. It will also help the spasm. It is those muscles which cause the pain of vaginismus. The squeezing and relaxing is called Kegel's Exercises

Once the pressure is gone, move on to the next size. If you can manage the largest trainer, you can manage a penis. (Even a large one)

You can order trainers from this site by clicking here

The purpose of trainers is to teach the vagina to allow something in without going into spasm. It is important to start with something small and easy, and then go on to something bigger.

Stanley Trainers are white plastic rods, the length of an erect penis, and with a round knob on the end you hold. They come in widths of 20mm, 25mm, and 30mm. you can get them from http://www.bbraun.com or by post from B.Braun Medical Ltd. Thorncliffe Park, Sheffield S35 2PW Phone 0114 225 9000

Sims Glass Dilators are hollow glass tubes, shorter than either of the other trainers. They come in 6 sizes, 25, 29, 30, 32, 33, 35mm, and increasing lengths at £52 for the set, or individually priced . You can get them from B. Braun, as above.

Stents are another form of dilator or trainer, designed especially to help the vagina after surgery or trauma has caused it to tighten up with scar tissue. See http://www.stentsitive.com for further details. The web site is full of more information than we can accommodate here, and we recommend it to you.