I am a 50 year-old male. My wife of 23 years is 54 years old and going through menopause (maybe near post menopause) she is not interested in sex any longer. We have not had any form of sex in the last 5 years. I have survived on fantasy and masturbation, but recently I have found myself attracted to several women, and came very close to having an affair, which my wife found out about. I have found my thoughts focusing more and more on sex and having an affair. I don't want to lose my wife, we have too much history and we have plans for the future. We have been in counseling, but her lack of desire or difference in libido has been considered my problem. Obviously, if I were to use depo-provera it would reduce or eliminate my sex drive. Would the side effects of depo-provera outweigh its use in reducing my libido?

I am a 27-year-old female and my fiance is a 35-year-old-male. I always have to initiate sex. Sometimes I think that if I did't initiate we would never have sex. I have even gone so far as to say "let's have sex tonight!" waiting for him to make the move and then nothing happens. I've gone to the bedroom after making a comment like that and have fallen asleep waiting on him. I think he masturbates more often than we have sex. Our ideas on sex in a relationship are different. I consider sex to be very important while he thinks ranks it lower on the scale of importence. We've discussed this problem many times but I don't think he gets the drift. We have great sex when we have it, but it's not often enough. I feel like the guy who always wants sex while he's the women who never wants it or is always tired!!!HELP!!