Can't Ejaculate inside her

Sex Problems for Men

I have never been able to ejaculate inside any girlfriend, even after marriage but I can from masturbation. I get all aroused before hand and penetrative sex is wonderful but I never come. I am divorced now (not because of my sex problem) from a wife who never loved me and we had very little sex and then I would have to do 'all' the work. I used to have to masturbate a lot by myself but now I am desperate to ejaculate inside my girlfriend. Sometimes when I am with her I can't even ejaculate by masturbation. I love my girlfriend and we can do everything - she is very orgasmic and willing to stimulate me in any way to help. She needs to be touching me in a certain way before I ejaculate (Is this 'approval'?). I used to be able masturbate next to my partner and then quickly insert my Penis to complete but I don't seem able to do that now.
Any advice please?

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Lick the perineum ...

My boyfriend had the same problem. He just didn't get enough stimulation inside the vagina. Then one day I was exploring his inner thighs and balls with my tongue. I started flicking my tongue in and out around the perineum ... the area south of the balls. He went wild. Once he was very aroused he was able to complete intercourse in the vagina. I call it my little secret spot. If sex seems to be progressing too slowly I just venture down there and start licking and it works (on him) every time. The last time he orgasmed that way he said it was a 5 star plus.

Retarded Ejaculation

I have had RE most of my adult life. After years of sex therapy a few causes have been unearthed. One thing is although I like women and enjoy their company, I have always been angry by the fact that women hold so much power in a sexual relationship. They choose whether or not to have sex. They hold the keys to a man's pleasure. The man has to work so hard in the song and dance of doing all the things he has to do to get a woman into bed. Or, the man has to pay to have sex and again the woman sets the amount and controls the time available. The man is also the one who has to perform. He has to be the one who does all the work during sex. I just wish women were more like men sexually. If they see a guy they want to have sex with they just do it.

Retarded Ejaculation

You are describing the classic features of "Retarded Ejaculation". This is almost always a difficult problem to solve, and you have already tried some of the obvious things.
If you are used to masturbating to strong fantasy and quite rough touch, then the vagina may simply not be stimulating enough for you.
Sometimes there are deeply held conflicts around "women" and the need to be both in control and get them to love you. These conflicts are set up in the early relationship with your mother and could be explored in psychotherapy.
The best advice I can give is to reccomend that you continue to enjoy the pleasure you and your girlfriend are having together, and try not to focus too much on your ejaculation. That way you will avoid both anxiety about coming,and disappointment if you don't.

retarded ejaculation

I know my boyfriend for a year now and he has not been able to ejaculate inside me (he can by masturbation). He is 34 years old and never had a girlfriend. I understood he needed to get used to have sex with someone, but after a year I start to be depressed that we will never have an enjoyable sexlife. I almost get problems getting orgams myself because I can only think about him not feeling anything. I proposed the exercises with light touch to him; he tried, but gave up. Always I start to talk about the problem; he does't really want to talk about it. We bought some advise sexbooks but only I am reading them. Wherever I am touching him, it tickles. He never says something about fantasies, only when I am asking about it he says just a little bit. I feel alone and often very sad, unattractive and rejected. I is a quite unexpressive person about everything which also makes it difficult for me. It is as if he has a major fear of expressing feelings. What kind of (sex) therapy is possible? I am afraid we will never enjoy our sexlife.

no ejaculation

For the past year i have been having problems with sexual dysfunction. viagra helps a little. I find that I can not achieve orgasm. I have the need; i.e., sexual arousal but cannot achieve orgasm. There seems to be absolutely nothing there. I do have an enlarged prostate, and I take yohimbine plus other pills. No luck. Urologists claim that there is nothing that can be done if viagra or other penis enhancement therapy don't help. A year ago it took me two hours to ejaculate. Now, nothing. Is it low sperm? The problem is physiological, not psychological, I'm sure.

Retarded ejaculation

I too have this same problem with my fiance. He can come easily if he masturbates, but cannot during intercourse, or even oral. He seems to need to "take matters into his own hands" to come. This has bothered me since day one, however I love him so much, I have never said a word, for fear if he senses my disapproval it may make matters worse. I am dead certain he is aware of this problem, because he goes well and beyond to make sure I am satisfied. I dont understand all this , but only twice during our 3 1/2 year live-in relationship he has come inside me .He has NO problem getting erect, in fact you would think he is the horniest man alive for 49 years old. This is so frustrating for me, I enjoy sex very much .I just dont know what to do, and should I speak up ? Is there actually a treatment for this problem, beacause Im sure he would never ever seek therapy.

Response to retarded ejaclation.

Hi, I there might be several factors contributing to your situation. You didn't mention if when he "takes matters into his own hands" you provide additional stimulation . For instance to his legs, testicles, perenium etc. You should discuss this with him but at a time other than during sex. Ok that being said. At 49 it is quite posible he achieves orgasm easier and with more intensity while maturbating and with your assistance. Aside from being erotic it is considerable less strenuous. Quite frankly shortness of breath or muscle fatigue may be inhibiting ejaculation during intercourse. Try increasing foreplay to get him closer to climax before intercourse. Try running your nails on his knees or reaching under to touch perenium. Possibly even add verbal stimulation and encouragement. If a guy sense he is on the clock ,lets say that might delay orgasm. Good luck!

Thank you, mpramage. Certainl

Thank you, mpramage. Certainly my girlfriend does not pressure me into having to ejaculate (I know this would be a problem with other women) and I thank her for that. I will continue to enjoy sex and love with her and try to relax and pressure myself.