Asserting ourselves with others is learnt early in life, and enables a sense of self to develop. This is done by expressing needs, rights, desires and hopes in ways that do not harm other people.
When assertiveness is lacking, you may find that you are not understood, and may be seen as shy or weak.
When assertiveness is too strong, you may be seen as overbearing or aggressive. Some people can swing between these two extremes.
In sexual relationships, it is quite common to be over assertive at the start of an encounter, and get into difficulties later on, as though we have not been true to who we really are.
In assertiveness training, we can learn to communicate our thoughts and views in a safe way. The therapist helps to identify where it seems to begin to go wrong, and teaches, by repetition and feedback, how to assert yourself more effectively. This can be done by one to one work, with a partner, or in groups for those who have no partner.