Please help me. I have been with my girlfriend for over 18 months. I finished with her about 10 months ago because I got scared by the commitment and didn't know if I wanted to be with her forever. This really hurt her as we had something very special. We kept in contact as we lived nearby and met up socially. Every time we met it ended in passionate sex as if we had just started something new again. This really surprised me as I never thought she would ever want to see me again. A month later, after I had had a long time to think I decided she was all I'd ever wanted and I hated myself for ever finishing with her so I told her how I felt. She told me it was "all or nothing" and that she'd love to get back together.

So we were back together and it felt great. But during the time that we were apart she had booked a holiday to Thailand and met lots of new people in order to move on. Although I was happy for her, I hadn't been involved in these things and I'd be lying if I said they didn't make me feel jealous. She went on holiday to Thailand and had a great time. I was pleased for her but again, I was jealous.

Now, everytime I see her or talk to her I'm totally paranoid that I'm going to lose her. I often convince myself that she's having an affair even though she's a very thoughtful, honest and trustworthy person.

I've tried to compensate for my jealousy by craving affection from her even though I know it's not right. This is especially apparent in bed. I seem to get horny everytime she cuddles and kisses me and I am never content with just cuddling her to sleep. I always want more and often try it on even if she is not in the mood or is sleepy. To make matters worse, if she tells me 'no', I go in a sulk and we often argue in the middle of the night because she is not giving me what I want. Of course, this is having the entirely opposite effect to what I want at the time. It is driving her away and putting her right off sex altogether. It then becomes a viscious circle as this makes me even more paranoid.

I keep telling her that we used to have amazing sex and so much passion that she would initiate but this seems to drive her away too. When I tell her this she often replies by telling me that it's not her I want, it's somebody else. I try to convince her it's not and that all I want is to go back to the way things were in the begining but she just thinks I'm being pathetic.

We keep having the same argument over and over again; especially when we have been drinking. It, or me, is destroying our relationship and it is wearing us both down. I feel like I have no self confidence anymore because I don't feel loved like I used to.

I really don't want to lose her but I feel that any day she's going to say enough is enough and want to find happiness again. I hate all this hurting and sadness, we are both really nice people and neither of us deserve it.

Is there a solution or should we both face facts and agree that things were good while they lasted but it's time to say goodbye?