I spent three years with an unavailable, controlling woman who was constantly pushing me away (let's call her Jane). I didn't really enjoy sex with her and found myself completely unable to enjoy anything sexual after we broke up.

After her, I became involved with a woman whose entire life seems to revolve around sex but who was upset because I didn't want it as much (call her Trina); after Jane the thought of sex just made me feel sad and/or tired. During the relationship with Trina, though, I found myself watching a lot of porn (and was actually beginning to enjoy it). One of the reasons Trina and I broke up was because of my avoidance of sex. After the breakup I didn't even look at porn for two months.

About a month ago I met a woman (call her Kami) and for the first time in four years I actually enjoyed having sex with someone; even multiple times a day (which is rare for me). During this time, however, I started having sex with Trina again and was thoroughly enjoying it with her as well. But now Trina has once again left and, although I still enjoy it, I have little desire to sleep with Kami. Again, the thought of it just makes me tired or want to cry.

Obviously I have had quite a bit of drama with women in the past few years and I'm sure that has more than a little to do with my problems but I would like feedback specifically about my tiredness and sadness. What do they mean? Is it because I still have feelings for Trina? Am I becoming involved with the wrong kinds of women and this is my body's way of telling me? Am I just afraid of being intimate because of all the past drama? Do I need to do some serious work around my beliefs about sex and intimacy?

Feedback welcome.